Monday 14 June 2010

Here is another interesting letter. It again addresses a common issue. I hope it and my answer again provoke thought and conversation within my readers communities
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Mistress Strict,

I hope this email finds you in good health and in
life. I have recently discovered the BDSM community and find
myself in a position that I have no one to ask questions to and get real
answers. I hope you can help. I have a couple of slaves that have thrown
themselves at my feet and I am super excited about it except I don't know
what to do with them. They have offered up house work & yard work. Never
having had a male offer to do those things is strange to me ........but what do slaves generally expect in return? Or what do I give them in return.
I don't want to use and abuse my slave unless he
asks so a little guidance would be so nice!

Mistress (in-training)


My dear Trainee,

From the very outset I must stress that the things I am about to say are only one Mistress's opinion. Ask several different Dommes the same questions, and you WILL get several different answers. With that caveat clearly in place I will proceed.

My first comments have to be about safety. YOUR safety.

I have no idea where these 'slaves' who have 'thrown themselves at your feet' have come from, but my first question is, Do you know them well enough and trust them sufficiently to invite them into your home? For a moment remove the D's aspect from the situation. Are these men that you would normally want visiting you at home alone? If you are not 100% sure then don't!!! Meet them first in a public location. For a coffee perhaps. Find out what it is they want.

Some who call themselves 'slave' are sexually turned on by being ordered to do manual labor for a dominant women. Are you prepared for that? Some slaves desire only to do your house work in return for your punishing them physically for doing a 'poor job'. Are you prepared for that? Do you know how to punish someone without causing physical damage?

There are so many wonderful opportunities to explore within the world of Ds. It must be remembered that the 'community' is made up of so many different people, each with their own kink. Communication is the key to any relationship. A Ds relationship is no exception. Talk to these 'slaves' Discuss with them what it is they REALLY desire.

I hope that helps.

Mistress Strict

Tuesday 8 June 2010

A question without an answer.

Below is a very common type of letter I receive. I wonder how YOU would reply?



Good evening Mistress Strict. I have long had a fantasy of putting myself in the control of a dominant woman. I am married; my wife would never understand this. I don't really know what would be involved and what boundaries are set if any. I am really quite nervous but excited at the prospect. Sorry I'm not trying to waste your time, I would just like to know a little bit more about what is involved.

Hope you can help

Tuesday 1 June 2010

A Letters reply

Greetings,

The other day I received the letter below. It is not the first of this type of email I have received, nor to I suspect will it be the last. I have decided to post it here, with my reply attach. The reply is of course only THIS Mistress's opinion. I hope that it might provoke some discussion and thought.
Hello mistress, and thank you for making the opportunity
and privilege of sending you a message so easy. As I have become older (
now 37) the need to serve and be controlled by a dominant women is
overwhelming. I have had some relationships with some wonderful ladies,
but cannot connect or get turned on at all. .................................................................. ...................Have you had any slaves like me, and if so what is the future if
I do not find a dominant women like yourself?



MY REPLY

In answer to your question, "Have I had any slaves like me, and if so what is the future if I do not find a dominant women like yourself?" my answer is yes. I have had the pleasure of being served by ones like you, I in fact have the great privilege of having a boy whom I cherish and who serves me well. I feel sure that there were times in his life when he felt like you. The desire to serve being strong within him and yet having no one to serve. A sub without a Mistress is like a lost soul, but there is aways hope. Just as in the vanilla world, one must meet many people before one meets a like minded spirit.

I would suggest that at 37 your search for the right Mistress is just beginning. Enjoy that journey. While you search for the right one, make every moment count. Dedicate yourself to learning HOW to serve. Ensure that when you do find 'the one' that you have the skills and dedication necessary to be as valuable to her as my boy is to me.

This is just one Mistress's opinion, but I believe that the gift of submission is a precious one. Don't give it away lightly. A Mistress must be worthy of your gifts just as you must be worth of her attention. Many claim the title of Mistress, not all are worthy of it, to take on a submissive is a responsibility, and an honour. There is no rush. Talk, mix with like minded people. Learn what is it that you desire.

I hope my words are of help.

Mistress Strict